Year In Review: What Was The Biggest Flop Of 2015?

Posted December 28, 2015 by with 65 comments

flop1

Many gay porn studios spent a lot of time in 2015 promoting scenes and series that, regardless of all the hype, were truly awful and didn’t resonate with viewers or critics. So, what was the biggest flop of 2015? Here’s what I considered to be the six biggest flops of 2015. Feel free to add your own pick(s) in the poll or the comments below.

SYTYCF-5-Gay-Porn-4

Dominic Ford: “So You Think Can Fuck”
This annual trainwreck is always terrible, but the 2015 version was even more tragic than previous seasons thanks to an embarrassingly trashy location, poorly-filmed sex scenes (as usual, thanks to the fact that Dominic Ford can’t direct his way out of a paper bag), and ridiculously ratchet “competitions.” Worst of all? The gimmick this year was that the porn stars were all supposedly dating, but the only real couple in the cast was Billy and Seth Santoro. Someone please put Dominic Ford out of his misery once and for all and tell him to stop wasting his time with this mess. Oh wait, I guess I just did.

gh1

GayHoopla’s Fake Fan Contest
GayHoopla got its members excited about entering a contest that allegedly would’ve ended with one of them fucking a GayHoopla model, but when the studio “randomly selected” a gay porn cam model as its winner, it became clear that they never intended to reward an actual fan or GayHoopla member. The most annoying thing is that there are probably plenty of GayHoopla members who are actually hotter than this phony winner!

afteglow

Hot House’s “After Glow”
Featuring arguably the ugliest set in the history of gay porn, Hot House’s “After Glow” was an endless day-glo nightmare of models fucking in Barbie’s Psychedelic Dreamhouse from 1994. And it wasn’t just the garish decor that made this the biggest boner killer of 2015. The absurd costumes (really, queen, you’re wearing a hot pink leather harness while you’re fisting someone?) and grotesque sex toys (is that a dildo or an ear of fucking corn?) helped make this the most unwatchable (you literally could not watch this without squinting or having to avert your eyes every few seconds) series of 2015.

bennett-julia

Men.com’s Busted Pretty Woman Parody
It would be insane for me to waste any more time writing about this, so I’m going to copy and paste what I wrote back in February: Yes, that’s Bennett Anthony in the blonde wig, and he looks like he’d rather be anywhere else (maybe in a church getting fucked by Rocco Steele?). Men.com is owned by one of the biggest and most profitable straight porn conglomerates in the entire world, and they couldn’t afford to spend more than $1.00 on a wig (if they even spent that)? And as bad as this looks, it actually gets worse when you watch the trailer. The camera work is shaky, the lighting is horrendous, the editing is schizophrenic, the sex itself is awkward and passionless, and the acting is embarrassingly awful (but at least maybe that part was deliberate). Were any fucks given during the production of this scene? Nope.

leozachLeo Giamani’s Comeback
Leo Giamani (a.k.a. the gay porn star version of a 10mg Ambien) has always been a bad performer, but his so-called comeback scene for TheGuySite was so bad, it made his previous work look…well…OK, everything he does is really fucking bad. If you only don’t watch one gay porn scene this year, make sure you don’t watch this one.

Screen-Shot-2015-11-27-at-10.52.23-PMSean Cody: Brandon’s Bottoming Debut
If you’ve always wanted to watch the human equivalent of a constipated and/or dead fish lying on its back for less than seven minutes while someone haphazardly tries to stick something up its butt, this is the scene for you. It’s not just the worst bottoming debut of all time, but possibly one of the worst Sean Cody scenes of all time, too. Brandon clearly needed a big paycheck, and Sean Cody obviously needed something to get people talking, but the overwhelmingly negative reviews (at least from fans and bloggers who actually bothered to give honest responses) were probably not what they had in mind. The old Sean Cody never would’ve released this disaster, and they probably would’ve put this scene directly into the trash. That’s what I immediately did after watching it once.

 


  • Stephen

    Fucking hate Bennett Anthony since that tweet, so that may have affected my vote.

  • sxg

    Considering the amount of hype leading up to Brandon’s bottoming debut, no way in hell there was any bigger flop than that scene!

  • cphotee

    These scenes almost make FoxNews look interesting. Almost.

  • Zealot

    I MUST nominate Duckface for being the gift that keeps on giving, as evidenced by:
    1. Mercilessly hawking Truvada’s virtues while ignoring basic biology and medical evidence that without condoms, Truvada’s benefits are at best, limited.
    2. Anti-Muslim tweets which are racist and ridiculously, insensitively, Sophomorishly putrid.
    3. Not knowing the true benefits of good old-fashioned elbow grease and a black light when cleaning up after your porn shoots. Even Nia Vardalos knows the benefits of Windex!
    4. Hiring Jed Athens
    5. Bouncing checks
    6. Hitting on the hired talent
    7. Railing on social media about porn-biz “traitors” who spill the T on smarmy director/producers who just can’t help but stick their head up their own ass when unattended by psychological professionals.

    • Zachary Sire

      that gif is so perfect for Duckface, but I love Donald Duck so I’m not sure how to feel

    • FrenchBug

      I do want to second your nomination (and indeed I thought “Lucas’s mere existence” would be a nominee when I read the title) but I do want to state for the record that your 1) is factually incorrect (https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/to-your-health/wp/2015/09/04/in-new-study-hiv-prevention-pill-truvada-is-startlingly-100-percent-effective/).
      As a supporter of PreP, I do find the fact his trashy irresponsible and dishonest self wormed his way into being one of the most vocal proponent of it to make me dislike him even more.

      • Zealot

        I agree PreP is great, and I certainly support its usage as recommended by the manufacturer– which stipulates PreP is most effective when used as a portion of an overall HIV/STI strategy, which should include condoms. Lucas seems to ignore other dangers to our health beyond those posed by HIV-AIDS. If he intended to address those dangers and the impact his productions have on the sexual behaviors of others, we’d still see condoms being used in his productions. As it now stands, ML can say PreP makes condomless porn safer…but not safe. Big difference. His decision to go condomless was a financial one, and had nothing to do with his concerns for the well-being of his talent.

        • FrenchBug

          Suscribe to everything you said and glad you expanded on your point. We agree.

          • Zealot

            Thanks. I know I can be like a dog with a bone about this, but it comes from a place of love and concern. I may not agree with everyone all the time (I mean, who does?), but that doesn’t mean I believe someone deserves to get sick from something we know how to stop. It seems crazy out there right now, and I’m hoping cooler heads prevail in this discussion so we’re all around when there’s a cure.

        • Porn Star

          Um all studios ignore that!! Condoms are only more effective than PrEP is they are used for oral. No studios use condoms for oral so most STIs can be transmitted ‘using’ condoms.

          • Zealot

            That’s a shame. As a porn actor’s health should be paramount in everyone’s mind and practices, yet apparently isn’t. And what you said about condoms and PreP is not accurate by a long shot. Condoms are still incredibly effective in preventing transmission of STIs, when used consistently for oral and/or anal sex, and did a pretty damn good job of stopping HIV. PreP was not intended to make bareback sex possible. It was to prevent transmission when a condom failed, or if a condom isn’t available, but the manufacturer is very clear that IT DOES NOT PREVENT OTHER STIS– which was my point to begin with. Both condoms and PreP are necessary to stop HIV and all other STIs whether you’re talking about life on a porn set or in daily life. Otherwise, you’re playing a game of odds– which is something I would not be willing to do with my health. There is a wealth of information available to those who want it on how STIs are transmitted and can be prevented– and porn studios should be mandated to include education and safer sex practices if for no other reason than it’s the moral thing to do if they care at all about their actors. But I’m not running a porn studio (obvi).

          • Porn Star

            That’s why a lot of studios require testing through PASS and Talent Testing. But. alas, no studio is having performers suck on condoms. So, PrEP is equally effective as a condom at this stage in the game.

          • Zealot

            (sigh) OK I give. But one last thought: When you mention PreP is as effective as condoms, you mean equal efficacy in terms of HIV transmission only, right? Coz that just isn’t true for other STIs. PreP does not prevent transmission of any other STIs. I hope we can agree on that anyway.

      • kevin

        PrEP is for cowards

        • Porn Star

          You are dumb. PrEP is for anyone having any kind of sex. How old are you to be so misinformed????

    • Scrapple

      DD’s flashin’ all that paper, but walking around without pants or shoes? Even animated bitches can be basic.

    • Joey

      Bless this mess. Wonder what 2016 will bring for him.

  • Silver64

    No surprise on the top Fail….and you can throw in another one for Leo Giamani and his new scene with Johnny…….pathetic…

    I’m beginning to think he’s thrown his back out…

    That, or he just forgot how to fuck…

  • hotdickcum

    Gonna admit that the biggest disappointment was Brandon getting fucked, but goddamn, he is beautiful in any shape and form, I can just look at that pic posted forever.

    • GN

      I think he had more of the boy next door appeal when he was leaner and less trunk-necked. He’s very fit tho, can’t knock him for that. I am just talking about his sex appeal.

  • paultacoma51

    Brandon’s bottoming wins by a landslide.

  • S .

    Brandon’s bottoming was the, ummm, top. Pun intended.

  • Scrapple

    Brandon’s bottoming debut was full of untapped (and unfucked) potential and missed cockportunities. Not to mention all that unnecessary hype before the scene went live. The “cryptic” tweets. The polls. The bottoming countdown clock. The profile vid with the weird “Mr. DeMille, I’m ready for my close-up” molestation at the end. So many issues.

    I had forgotten about that tragic Pretty Woman parody. It’s hilarious to see how little money Men spent on this movie, and compare it to the budget they laid out for their Star Wars series. They’ve got all these costumes, sets and props for that series, but they couldn’t be bothered to get Bennett a decent lace front wig. It was all very low rent, but that happens to be in Bennett’s wheelhouse.

  • Izzy

    It’s impossible to choose between these flopulous flops.

  • Ricky

    Jacob Ladder. He seemed gorgeous and witty at the start of the year but as time went on he was revealed to be petulant and a lifeless performer with mediocre cum shots and a belly.

  • Russell47

    SC’s Brandon “deflowering” got my thumbs up. (Certainly nothing else “was up”). Compare this mess with Christian Wilde’s on screen bottoming debut. The 2 Mr Wilde’s certainly knew how to keep our interest high, what with discussion & then Christian preparing with various dildos. The scene was, IMO awesome too, with various shots of various positions, & Christian seemed to enjoy the fuck out of it. Austin too seemed in 7th heaven, as was I just watching!

  • snoopyfo

    72% of votes LMAO it was awful, not even sexy tanner could save that shit

  • Brian Sky

    I added my own pick to the list, it was: Men’s Next Men Exclusive contest. Although probably this didn’t even generate enough interest and expectation to be considered as a flop.

  • Todd

    Uhhhhh ….. Jarec Wentworth’s extortion attempt.

    …. oh, you meant IN porn ……..never mind.

    …. https://img.pandawhale.com/post-43000-im-a-mouse-duh-gif-Imgur-Mean-koZN.gif

  • andrew

    Looks like it’s too close to call.

  • KP

    Biggest flop Condoms! PrEP, PrEP, baby.

  • Maximus

    It wouldn’t be right to discuss things flopping in gay porn without bringing up the near ubiquity of floppy-dicked (non)performers. Here’s a hint for 2016, gay porn producers of the world: Chemistry.

    https://media3.giphy.com/media/zvnS1Ey1v1kCQ/giphy.gif

  • kevin

    the Return of Abe: STAY AWAY!!!!

  • Zachary Sire

    For anyone wondering what people are typing into the “Other” option:

    • Ceecee

      “Get a life you sad cunt”
      Gurl you makin’ friends. Don’t forget Michael Lucas comparing you to Judas somewhere in the roundups. That one was good.

    • WhimsyCotton

      Poll? What poll? I don’t see a poll.

  • ezra.jones

    Pretty Girls is the biggest flop of the year but Brandon’s Bottoming scene comes in 2nd.

    • RS

      Mess at you getting banned before the Awards. Oh well. C2C crossed 710K last week – it’s coming for Plat. And Adele’s first 5 weeks of 25 sales outsold Tity’s lifetime album sales. What a week for talent!

      • ezra.jones

        Ugh i knew it was coming the modneys are obsessed. Hope brinny’s batteries die while she’s on the toilet and she’s literally immobilized forever

      • ezra.jones

        which awards. The Oscars?

        • RS

          ddd this was the Monster Awards which you were meant to host. I can’t at Adele giving Sam Smith that Oscar simply because her power made Bond songs relevant.

  • WhimsyCotton

    We all know the biggest flop of 2015 was ANTI’s buildup and lack of release. If we’re focusing on porn though, it is 100% that abysmal Brandon bottoming debut. It managed to eclipse all the trash CF released this year.

  • karlk

    SC. The never ending “Getaway” , what a way to ruin the end of the year. Bring together a group of guys you never want to see again, and feature them in who knows 6, 7, straight updates. This completes MG’s destruction of what was the best gay porn site!

  • Austin Wolf being a flop fuckboy garbage person.

  • Rod Iron

    I love this site! Zach, you are a talented writer with a knack for cracking wise in the best possible way.. But now I’m torn between voting for Afterglow or Brandon’s botton as both descriptions are guffaw inducing.

    OK, after a re-read – the constipated fish wins by a hair (pfffttht) Looking forward to more brilliance in 2016!