I Was Physically Assaulted At A Grabbys Pre-Party

Posted May 23, 2014 by with 14 comments

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Last night, I attended Chi Chi LaRue’s Grabbys’ kick off party at Hydrate in Chicago, and I should have known by the way people were looking at me that maybe I should have stayed home.

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All I wanted to do was take pics of my favorite gay porn stars Jake Bass, Tommy Defendi, Ryan Rose, Ricky Roman, Trenton Ducati, and Dillon Rossi…but no one was willing to even pretend to be happy about it.

People who are ordinarily friendly—like JD Phoenix, Boomer Banks, Alessandro Del Toro, Eli Lewis, JR Bronson, Ray Han, and Diesel Washington—made it clear how they really felt.

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All I wanted to do was say hi to Chi Chi LaRue, but instead she shined a giant laser beam out of her chest to try and blind me!

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Things quickly took a turn for the worse when someone tried to throw a twink at me. I couldn’t believe it, because this was the second year in a row that someone tried to assault me using a weaponized twink.

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At this point, I knew I had to get out of there—and fast. Unfortunately, before I could leave, Diesel Washington picked up Levi Karter and threw him at me!

IMG_7177IMG_7179Last night, I was assaulted by flying twinks, and I’m not sure if I’ll be attending any other events this weekend. Sorry.

 

  • robirob

    Grabby’s Game of Twinks

    More brutal and vicious than HBO’s Game of Thrones.

  • James Withers

    Levi Karter being thrown at you is assault? That’s a crime I want to be a victim of.

  • Spongey

    I can’t get over how short Duncan Black is. It sort of makes him more adorable. I’d rather have a flying twink over a drink thrown at me. Besides, didn’t your night end up with your legs up in the air at bath house? Admit it! I love your Grabby recaps.

    • Alan

      Duncan is NOT short – he’s over 6′ tall – he must be sitting on a stool in that pic…

      • J2

        Yeah. I don’t know what’s going on in that picture but I don’t think it’s feasible the lady with glasses is chest-high to Jake Bass. It also kind of looks like she’s dexterously using one hand to hold a drink and flip the bird.

        • OneOfTheManyChris

          The lady with the glasses works for Cockyboys and calls herself a pixie. So yeah, I think she might be that short.

  • DeanD

    I would also love to see a Diesel/Levi scene too, but only after a Diesel/Tyson scene.

  • Todd

    So happy you made up with Billy Santoro. Imagine how much worse it could’ve been. Are you sure that people are throwing twinks at you ? Perhaps you are a twink magnet. Do NOT set any drinks down this year !

    • sxg

      I’m sure Billy would have done nothing but curse Zach out and maybe throw a drink at him.

  • C3xxx

    JD Phoenix’ middle finger can be oh so enjoyable!

  • NG212

    Not sure if serious…

  • Zealot

    Who do I have to piss off to get Tayte Hanson thrown at me? No kidding. Whatever it takes, I’ll fucking do it!