List Of Things Stuck Inside Penises In 2025

Posted January 5, 2026 by with 2 comments

We saw the list of things stuck up rectums in 2025, and now it’s time for the list of things stuck inside penises in 2025. Assholes are one thing and I know there’s a lot of crazy bottoms out there, but I don’t think anything should ever be put inside your dick, so this list is even more horrifying. Like the rectums list, this list was pulled from actual real-life emergency room visits, via the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission’s database:

  • Battery
  • Candle wax
  • Chess piece
  • 2 glass beads
  • Pen
  • Pencil
  • Comb
  • Apple stems
  • Apple core
  • Bobby pin
  • Paper clip
  • Magnets
  • Spring
  • Screw
  • Staples
  • Thermometer
  • Headphones
  • Guitar string
  • Allen wrench

I know Allen wrenches are relatively thin, but jesus fucking christ. Also, I hope the chess piece was just a pawn and not a knight or a bishop, given the way those are shaped.

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