Side Of Alaska Airlines Plane Rips Off Mid-Flight, Giving Passengers Beautiful View Of Starlit Night Sky

Posted January 6, 2024 by with 5 comments

If Alaska Airlines had known this was going to happen shortly after taking off from Portland, Oregon, you better believe they would’ve charged everyone at least $500 more on their tickets for giving them such a breathtaking (literally!) view of the night sky. News on the side of a plane blowing out in mid-air last night via KCAL:

“The safety of our guests is always our primary priority.” Yes! This is so true. The number one priority for airlines like Alaska isn’t increased profits and keeping shareholders happy by filling up their cheaply constructed tin cans with as many guests as possible, it’s the “safety” of those guests inside those tin cans that only rarely self-combust once they’re 20,000 feet up in the air.

In the video below, there’s some narration from one of the flight’s passengers, with more footage from inside the cabin. Some reports are saying that the “window” exploded, but you can see in the video that it’s obviously not a normal plane window, and it looks to have been the entire side panel, floor to ceiling. Sadly, no one was sitting in the row next to the side that blew open, which clearly would’ve been the best seat in the house:

I’m surprised everyone put on the masks, given that those chin diapers don’t even work, and being forced to wear one is a violation of your civil rights, not to mention HIPAA. Real Americans™ aren’t scared of contracting a deadly virus, but these passengers were apparently afraid of a little hypoxia and dying of oxygen deprivation? Pussies.