Completely Naked Wisconsin Pastor Arrested For Jacking Off In Walmart Parking Lot

Posted August 14, 2023 by with 6 comments

Straight white male pastor? Check.
Masturbating in public? Check.
Walmart? Check.

Just another day in the life of the average American “man of God.” Via Kenosha County Eye:

Someone summoned the Kenosha County Sheriff’s Department to the Somers Walmart early Thursday morning, August 10th. The person saw a male white, fully naked, standing next to a black truck and appeared to be masturbating.

According to Kenosha County Sheriff spokesman Lt. Ryan Markowski, 57-year-old Thomas Bartmer was seen by responding deputies quickly getting into the truck, while still naked. Bartmer reportedly admitted to the act.

[Kenosha County Eye]

The pastor was arrested, booked, and released all within about two hours, and he’s expected to be charged with misdemeanor disorderly conduct and lewd acts in public.

The pastor’s bio on his church’s website has of course been pulled down, but here’s a screenshot from the top of the cached version:

The pastor and his wife have a personal website full of photos from their farm with a bunch of cute little sheep, and you can’t help but feel bad for the wife. What the hell is she supposed to do now? It looks like they have a huge amount of private land where he could’ve jerked off anywhere he wanted (if he had to do it outdoors), but instead, he chose a public parking lot.