Grabbys Predictions Part 1: Who Will Win, Who Should Win, And Who Doesn’t Stand A Chance In Hell

Posted May 19, 2014 by with 5 comments

grabbysThe 2014 Grabbys will be held this Saturday, May 24th at Metro in Chicago, with returning hosts (for the 800 millionth time) Chi Chi LaRue and Honey West. Joining them as co-hosts are Trenton Ducati, Adam Killian, Shawn Wolfe, Jesse Jackman, Jason Phoenix, and either Christopher Daniels or Levi Karter (they keep changing the flyer, so who knows). I’ll be there with live, 24/7 coverage from Wednesday through Sunday, and here is Part 1 of my annual predictions for who will win, who should win, and who doesn’t stand a chance in hell. Part 2 is coming later this week.

Like every year, I usually get most of these dead wrong, so please keep that in mind. The Grabbys are known for dividing up the awards as diplomatically and equally as possible, so the only real guarantee to be made is that everyone always wins at least one award. Full list of nominees here.

(Note that in some performer categories, The Grabbys select 2 winners.)

levi shawn wolfe gay pornBEST NEWCOMER
Boomer Banks
Blue Bailey
Johnny Blum
Joey Cooper
Donnie Dean
Mike DiMarco
Colton Grey
Levi Karter
Connor Kline
Kevin Lee
Jessie Montgomery
Hunter Page
Nick Prescott
Adam Ramzi
Armond Rizzo
Billy Santoro
Damien Taylor
Tyson Tyler
Austin Wolfe
Shawn Wolfe

Will Win: Shawn Wolfe and Levi Karter
Should Win: Tyson Tyler and Levi Karter
Doesn’t Stand A Chance: Connor Kline

Connor retired in February, so I can’t see the Grabbys giving it to him (although, he would have easily won had he not left the industry). And while Hunter Page, Boomer Banks, Billy Santoro, and Tyson Tyler had big years, the Grabbys are too obsessed with Shawn and Levi not to honor them here.

Dale-Cooper-and-JD-Phoenix-NakedSword-Golden-Gate-The-Cover-Up-gay-porn-4BEST ACTOR
Jessy Ares – Original Sinners
Dale Cooper – Golden Gate 5, Nakedsword
Christopher Daniels – Teddy Bear – Channel 1 Releasing
Trenton Ducati – Silence of the Cams 1 & 2
Jimmy Durano – My Doctor Sucks – Hot House
Jesse Jackman – Dick Danger – Titan Men
Hunter Marx – Shag – Titan Men
Jessie Montgomery – Helix Academy – Helix Studios
Hunter Page – Frat House Cream – Nakedsword
Ricky Roman – The Haunting, Cockyboys
Tate Ryder – Silence of the Cams 2
Brett Summers – America’s Next Hot Bottom – Jet Set Men
Shawn Wolfe – Timberwolves, Raging Stallion Studios

Will Win: Dale Cooper
Should Win: Dale Cooper or Ricky Roman
Doesn’t Stand A Chance: Brett Summers

Dale was fantastic as a San Francisco councilman trying to pass a nudity ban, and his role required the most actual acting and had the most dialogue (he gave a lengthy speech in the middle of the Castro), so this is his to lose. (Full disclosure: I created Dale’s character and wrote most of the screenplay for Golden Gate 5, so I’m probably biased.) Meanwhile, how was Jet Set Men, which hasn’t released a movie since, like, 2011, even nominated for anything?

BEST SCREENPLAY
America’s Next Hot Bottom – Jet Set Men
Dick Danger – Titan Men
Frat House Cream – Nakedsword
Golden Gate 5 – Nakedsword
Helix Academy – Helix Studios
Manly Seduction – Kristen Bjorn
My Doctor Sucks – Hot House Entertainment
Original Sinners – Lucas Entertainment
Silence of the Cams 1 & 2 – Dominic Ford
The Boy who cried D.I.L.F. – Channel 1 Releasing
The Haunting – Cockyboys
Timberwolves – Raging Stallion Studios

Will Win: Golden Gate 5
Should Win: Golden Gate 5
Doesn’t Stand A Chance: America’s Next Hot Bottom

Most of these didn’t even have scripts, but of the ones that did, I have to fall back on my aforementioned bias and go with Golden Gate 5. With that said, I fully expect to lose. The Haunting or Helix Academy could easily win.

s27548_action_full_635164087295208650BEST VERSATILE PERFORMER
Jake Bass
Landon Conrad
Dale Cooper
Christopher Daniels
Tommy Defendi
Trenton Ducati
Jake Genesis
Diesel O’Green
Adam Killian
Connor Kline
Ryan Rose
Christian Wilde
Shawn Wolfe

Will Win: Christopher Daniels
Should Win: Ryan Rose
Doesn’t Stand A Chance: Christian Wilde

I love Christian Wilde more than life itself, but bottoming one time doesn’t make someone versatile. So many of these guys have already won Grabbys (Trenton Ducati, Landon Conrad, Adam Killian, Tommy Defendi), so it won’t be any of them. Christopher Daniels is a deserving performer who has yet to win a Grabby, so it’s his time. But, Ryan Rose feels more like the epitome of versatile to me (and to fans).

logan-vaughn-and-angel-rock-hothouse-gay-porn-stars-hardcore-gay-porn-group-sex-gay-orgy-video-15-gay-porn-pics-photoHOTTEST TOP
Angelo
Gabriel Clark
Tommy Defendi
Topher Dimaggio
Trenton Ducati
Jimmy Durano
Dale Cooper
Kris Evans
Connor Maguire
Hunter Marx
Angel Rock
Johnny Ryder
Sean Xavier
Christian Wilde
Will Win: Angel Rock
Should Win: Connor Maguire
Doesn’t Stand A Chance: Jimmy Durano

Jimmy won this category last year, so he’s out. My personal favorite is Connor Maguire (hello, he fucked someone hanging upside down from a tree), but given that Angel Rock never bottoms, they’ll likely give it to him.

cockyboys-Bearded-muscle-stud-Tommy-Defendi-fucks-Duncan-Black-Darius-Ferdynand-young-hunks-thick-dick-003-male-tube-red-tube-gallery-photoHOTTEST BOTTOM
Riley Banks
Duncan Black
Joey Cooper
Christopher Daniels
Seven Dixon
Dario Dolce
Darius Ferdynand
Alexander Gustova
Jesse Jackman
Levi Karter
Connor Kline
Lance Luciano
Jessie Montgomery
Diesel O’Green
Dominic Pacifico
Adam Ramzi
Max Ryder
Damien Taylor
Shawn Wolfe
Will Win: Duncan Black
Should Win: Duncan Black
Doesn’t Stand A Chance: Riley Banks
I don’t see how they can fuck this one up.
2_120115_1280-e13972658346022_120116_1280-e1397266001451
HOTTEST COCK
Angelo
Doug Acre
Boomer Banks
Jace Chambers
Topher DiMaggio
Dmitry Dickov
Kris Evans
Darius Ferdynand
Alexander Garret
Diesel O’Green
Connor Kline
Lance Luciano
Evan Parker
Billy Ramos
Hayden Richards
Angel Rock
James Ryder
Christian Wilde
Sean Xavier
Will Win: Boomer Banks
Should Win: Boomer Banks or Dmitry Dickov
Doesn’t Stand A Chance: Hayden Richards
If Boomer Banks doesn’t win this award, it might be time to question the sanity and integrity of the Grabbys voting committee.
Coming later this week: Best Movie, Best Director, Best Performer, and more!

  • Alan

    ” it might be time to question the sanity and integrity of the Grabbys voting committee.”

    Since I do that every year, why should this one be different?

  • Zealot

    We might consider Jake Genesis as someone “Who Doesn’t Stand a Chance” in “Best Versatile Performer”…..just based on how he left the industry. Would the voters even consider him after the strange and unexpected way he did it?

  • Casey Scott

    Even with your bias aside, yes GOLDEN GATE 5 does deserve Best Screenplay, and Dale Cooper deserves Best Actor! Seeing as how Duncan Black can’t seem to ever stay hard while getting fucked, I would not give him Best Bottom. Darius Ferdynand or Connor Kline are better bets. Kline’s departure from the business shouldn’t really deter voters from picking him. Why not honor him on his farewell with an award? It’s not like he pulled a Jake Genesis-style exit.

    Kind of surprised Tommy Defendi didn’t get nominated in the Hottest Cock category. His equipment is practically perfection. But Boomer Banks has that one locked away.

  • La Bambi

    Once again Next Door’s Bambi is snubbed in all the major categories. Do the Grabby’s have a Best Makeup? Best Actress? At least throw an honorary Grabby her way, she is an icon.

    • zach

      Agreed! At least a nomination in the non-sexual performance category.